It has been a while since I read the Bible for the last time... and I mean a while. For someone like me, who has dedicated at least one thought a day to the spiritual world, is rare, almost suicidal.
I came to this cite from 2 Timothy 3:2 New American Standard Bible (© 1995) "For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy," only by google it. It has been hard to understand how money has take the best out of us. When it is not the lack of it, is the excess of it, but it spoilers it all.
I find ingratitude an expression of the most low human kind. yet I also think we are all ingrates in a certain point. Big or small, direct or unconscious, we all fall in to it.
Then I read this "There is too little good in the world for us to indulge in ingratitude." I guess everybody has the choice. I am trying hard not to be an ingrate, as I see others playing it so graciously and purposeful, I wonder where I got lost, where I put the life of others before mine, where did I choose sacrificing to help all the way to see success in 'thy selfish neighbor" I just don't know.
I am not the fairy in the tale either, by taking care of others I have been an ingrate to myself, and when turning to myself I have neglected others, who directly depend on me, there is no way out of it, it's like walking in the razor's edge, the balance it's so thin, I can hardly move
Though I am looking for inspiration. That is the way I was raised... by whom I was raised. It's time to pay back.
I enjoyed Ismar Schorsh by his reflections of ingratitude. Particularly when he said ""Never throw a stone into a well from which you have drunk" (Bemidbar Rabba 22:4). Let not the pain of a recent injustice obliterate the memory of an earlier gesture of compassion."
I think I am far from where I was, but I was far from it when I thought I was in it... just by being alone.. I guess I wanted to belive in people, I am getting older.
